And I've been questioning why. Something definitely isn't right. Something more than just being sleep deprived. Cynicism and pessimism has crept in. I've been getting stuck in the negatives.
So this talk is a good reminder. In it, Alice Ledgerwood discusses our human tendency to remember the negatives over the positives. We find it easier to change from a positive mindset to a negative one. By contrast, it is much harder to change from a negative mindset to a positive one.
She suggests two ways to combat this; ways which closely parallel Christianity. Ledgerwood firstly describes how important taking time to be thankful is, how it makes a difference in terms of health, happiness and wellbeing. As Christians, saying grace, and thanking God, is an integral part of the relationship that we have with Him, and the practice of our faith.
The second point is addresses the way we tend to fixate on negative perspectives. We remember the insult far longer than we remember the compliment, and we pass on that negativism. Someone shouts at you, and you shout back, and you snap at another person, who snaps at another person, who snaps at another person... Ledgerwood suggests that returning good for bad is a way to break the chain. She suggests we return negative interactions with positive ones. For instance, giving the waitress with a bad attitude the extra large tip. This bears a striking resemblance to Jesus' preaching to love our enemies:
27 “But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, 28 bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. 29 If someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also. If someone takes your coat, do not withhold your shirt from them. 30 Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. 31 Do to others as you would have them do to you.
32 “If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them.33 And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that.34 And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, expecting to be repaid in full. 35 But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be childrenof the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. 36 Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.
Positivism doesn't just affect you, one person, but it affects others around you - your network. About a year ago, I read a thought-provoking book written by Daniel Goleman called Social Intelligence. Contrary to what the title might suggest, this wasn't a self-help book on improving your social skills and emotional intelligence. Rather, it explored the implications of the neuroscience of our social brain, and how it affects our lives. Goleman names the phenomenon put forward by Ledgerwood emotional contagion and discusses its effect in relationships. Research has shown that stressful relationships and conflict drives up stress hormones and blood pressure, and lowers immune function. By contrast, positive relationships providing a major source of satisfaction and well-being, as well as general good health. This opinion piece describes a similar phenomenon with regards to marriage. Goleman goes on to cite numerous scientists and physicians who provide both anecdotal experience as well as supporting data to show how important emotional support, or simply put, the Christian tenet to love thy neighbour, can make all the difference in preserving quality of life and coping with disease. Reflecting on my course of my study, I have found that this echoes resonates with a significant base of evidence to show that in numerous conditions, from suicide risk to heart attacks, from stroke to dementia, the presence of emotional support, such as a spouse, can make a critical difference.- Luke 6, NIV
So how do we skirt illness and death? How do we find happiness? How do we find meaning in life? Peace? It would seem Jesus is right. Ledgerwood is right. That the answer is simple, simply love others, and be thankful. Jesus terms this loving God and loving others. There are many ways to love God, but a major way we do this is by giving thanks to Him. And perhaps, in some very indirect way, all these things - happiness, good health, and everything we think we want - will fall into its place.
27 “Consider how the wild flowers grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 28 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you—you of little faith! 29 And do not set your heart on what you will eat or drink; do not worry about it. 30 For the pagan world runs after all such things, and your Father knows that you need them. 31 But seek his kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well.
- Luke 12, NIV
On another vein, these thoughts have interesting implications on the practise of health. To my knowledge, public health has generally revolved around epidemiology and prevention, but the importance of "soft" factors like staying postive, like being loved, are still under-recognised.
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