Thursday, June 1, 2017

The courage to connect



Sometimes the fear of rejection is so powerful that rather than risk being rejected, one would rather reject, or give up on opportunity.

Perhaps part of the appeal of becoming a doctor is the idea of implicit acceptance. You are let into the life of another, someone who sees the doctor as a confidant. You are someone who is needed. You are accepted. As a doctor, you see people who, at their most vulnerable, act or speak in pain, or grief or anger, and you endeavour to dissociate yourself and remain objective and impartial. Beyond maintaining a demeanour of professionalism, I am coming to realise that an essential part of being a doctor is the offering of acceptance. Acceptance of who they are, and what they are going through, and being willing to see them through their suffering, regardless of the way they treat you or others. This comprises a large part of the therapeutic rapport of a doctor.

Acceptance of who people are, and what they are going through, and being willing to see them through their suffering, regardless of the way they treat you or others. This also comprises a large part of being a parent. A spouse. A friend. Perhaps if more people could offer this to each other there would be less need for doctors.

One of the scariest things about being an artist is the tremendous vulnerability of knowing that you are putting yourself out there to be judged. It is the fear of rejection - a critical audience. Or perhaps of an even harsher critic - the self.

A question I keep returning to is why leave what I have to face such potential for rejection. I once came across a phrase -- courage is not the absence of fear, but the judgement that there is something more important than fear.

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