I'm willing to tell you. I'm wanting to tell you. I'm waiting to tell you.

We spend most of our lives waiting for things to happen. Eventually, you come to accept it as a part of life. Some people are able to do it graciously and patiently, while others will whine their way through it - I remember when I was four, how I used to have to wait for unimportant grown-up stuff, like checking the apartment for locked doors and windows, to be done, and lilting, "Why are we waiting?"

Well, one reason might be that we are waiting for someone else to act. Much of our lives consist of the things that are beyond our control, and most of our lives are spent waiting for these things to occur - whether it's waiting for army to be over, waiting to reach a destination, waiting for someone to call, or waiting in the doctor's office. It might even be as big as waiting for love, or waiting for the new covenant to be fulfilled. Or worse (to pull a Hermione Granger), waiting for late exam results.

Another reason might be that we ourselves aren't ready. We've got other commitments, we're afraid, or we don't have the skills required to take on the challenge - for instance, as much as I longed to ski down the Snowy Mountains last week, I knew that I just wasn't ready for that then.

To put it simply, we have no choice.

Even though it often feels frustratingly akin to doing nothing, waiting is still an action, of sorts. According to my trusty Oxford Apple Dictionary (OAD), the word 'wait' came from the word 'wake', which means to emerge from a state of sleep, become aware of, or cause to stir. This puts things in quite a different light - when we wait for something, we are aware of the likelihood of something happening, and that changes the way we live. From a state of sleeping unawareness to that of waking, we have shifted our perspectives, our modes of life, in a significant way.

Sometimes, the best way we can handle this awareness is to carry on as we were - pretending like we didn't even know it was going to happen. But although on the surface it may seem to pass muster, this is never really the case. Whether we will or nay, we keep ourselves attuned to that thing we know will happen. In fact, early senses of the word 'wait' included to be watchful, or observe carefully. In a sense, waiting is a filter of what we see - if we are waiting on the good stuff, we can be optimistic (although some might say we will be disappointed). We can never be completely objective our observation, and waiting is what colours our lenses.

Besides being alert to what we are waiting for, we also prepare ourselves for it. The OAD says that some aspects of the word 'wait' include being ready for a certain purpose. Today at church we had an interesting sermon that tied in perfectly with this; the preacher presented the time between the Lord's first and second coming as a window of opportunity to repent and come to God, as a period of grace - the Lord is waiting for us to be ready, we aren't just waiting for him.

Waiting may seem pointless, futile, or like you're just plain doing nothing, but it's a deceptively active verb - you need to be on the alert, you need to make yourself ready. You may have no choice but to wait, but what you do have a choice in: how you respond when that thing that you've been waiting for happens, will depend on how you've waited.