The other day in bible study, our leader asked us why we, or other people, might write poetry. He then asked us to write an 'If' poem as part of an exercise to introduce us to the study of Psalms. Since then, these ideas have been playing on my mind.
If asked that question in a setting where I wasn't under pressure to not answer and appear an emo-kid, I would probably say that the reason why I write poetry or enjoy art of any form is because in reality, I repress my feelings. Rather than limit them to the banality of their everyday context (petty annoyances, base desires, irrational fears), I'd rather invest them in an avenue with a higher rate of return. I get to control exactly how much I reveal, how much I explore, what the listener gets out of the poem. A poem doesn't limit you to reality, either.
I used to favour dance as the way to tell the greatest truths of myself to my audience. Poetry, I suppose is a natural extension of that. It too is focused on expression through a medium (the human body/words) and the movement inherent (in dance sequences, or the formation of sentences). It may not be about me, but in creating it, I often feels as though I were baring some part of myself that I normally keep hidden.
Even if my heart says yes, my mind says no
(based on A Walk To Remember)
If
this were yesterday, I
might've said yes to you. I was
happy to bask in the love of another,
then - I would not
be so afraid to let my heart be thawed by
the heat of your pull
on my heartstrings, and your assurance not to break them, or -
ever let them go.
But because
this is today,
I am sorry,
but my answer is no.
But even if being around you arrests my senses,
makes time stop and space irrelevant,
even if it feels like more than just another EM-pty pull, it's
just a lull - a break from reality's gravity, for today.
For even if this were yesterday,
you can't change my tomorrow.
